Empty

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On the warmest, brightest day I’ve seen since last spring, I hide in the darkness of my bedroom, working and watching tv shows. Lost causes have spiraled into further loss-making territory; old connections, long ago severed, take on more permanent disconnection when I learn they’ve moved on to greener pastures. Is that enigmatic? It gives me pause to reflect on my choices – how I chose the life I have and my independent place in it. I don’t want something different but can still wonder how different it might have been.

Does that mean that there are not occasional, but cold, empty days?

Is there such a thing as “natural” Cheetos?

Change could not come at a better time.

doon the toon

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Safety and stability are illusions. You can feel like you are in a really good place and be hit by setbacks. Even if temporary, they stop you in your tracks. Evaluate. Do you have to start from the beginning again? Do you start where you left off but with a lot less trust and enthusiasm? And if you do continue, nursing the wounds and bearing the scars, less trusting, more worried, always cautious – should you? Is that best for anyone involved?