December has never been like this before.
Snowless, mild, clear and sunny every day. Awash in untold volumes of new music, the ears feasting on constant new sound. Afloat on seas of shared poetic waves and shared everything else, that has still somehow left me adrift in conflicted/conflicting feelings that have me reeling. Awaiting resolution of some kind, not knowing if any will come.
And still there is a new year ahead; I am counting the minutes. I have never so eagerly watched the calendar, waiting as the days tick by so slowly. After all, this kind of time, marking one year and arbitrarily moving to the next, is meaningless. This year it feels like it needs to be closed. Shut tight. Every year has its ups and downs, but nothing has been like 2o16 on a personal and more ‘global’ level in terms of shocks, losses, horror shows and the sprouting seed of fear for the future. I may want this year to end desperately but don’t know what the next one holds so can only focus for the time being on my own little bunker, life, corner of the world and concerns.
And, as the new year creeps up on us (please hurry), I hope anyone reading this will do the same – care for yourself and your loved ones and go from there. That’s the best I can hope for right now.