that spring

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That Spring Everything Grew Wild and The Rain Came Down Like Punishment
Clementine von Radics

I sat on the fire escape
until the ashtrays were snowdrifts,
watching for storms on the horizon.
Begging the world for a reason
to lock all the doors.

Change came to me
so ugly then.
Showed up alone
with moldy suitcases
and too many demands, speaking
the language of hard looks
and wine headaches.
Telling me things I did not want
to know, growling,

Getting everything you ever wanted
does not make you want less

and

You break the hearts
of better people
who get in your way.

When will I stop belonging
to this hungry thing inside me?

What no one ever talks about
is how dangerous hope can be.
Call it forgiveness
with teeth.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

lobsters

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The Story Behind Lobsters
Clementine von Radics

The story behind lobsters
is that they weren’t thought of as cuisine
until the nineteenth century. Before that
they were considered peasant food
and most often served in prisons.

The story behind diamonds
is that they were just rocks until 1938
when a marketing campaign
forever linked them with love.

The story behind us
is that you said I won’t wait forever
and I didn’t really listen.

The story behind art
is that no one calls it a masterpiece
until it has already been bought,
until it is hanging on the wall
in someone else’s home.

The story behind us
is that until I lost you I had no idea
what you were worth.

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

there is the worst

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There Is the Worst and then There is More
Clementine von Radics

You silly little girl,
you think
you’ve survived so long
survival shouldn’t hurt anymore.

You keep trying to turn
your body bulletproof.
You keep trying to turn your heart
bomb shelter.

Stop, darling.

You are soft and alive
you bruise and you heal. Cherish it.
It is what you were born to do.

It will not be beautiful,
but the truth never is.

Come now,
you promised yourself.
You promised
you’d live through this.

Photo by Evie S. on Unsplash