that spring


That Spring Everything Grew Wild and The Rain Came Down Like Punishment
Clementine von Radics

I sat on the fire escape
until the ashtrays were snowdrifts,
watching for storms on the horizon.
Begging the world for a reason
to lock all the doors.

Change came to me
so ugly then.
Showed up alone
with moldy suitcases
and too many demands, speaking
the language of hard looks
and wine headaches.
Telling me things I did not want
to know, growling,

Getting everything you ever wanted
does not make you want less


You break the hearts
of better people
who get in your way.

When will I stop belonging
to this hungry thing inside me?

What no one ever talks about
is how dangerous hope can be.
Call it forgiveness
with teeth.

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash