I don’t have any words of wisdom this month. I’ve been busy with my sudden students status, but nothing ever stops me from finding and listening to music. I invite you to listen, too.
01 Nico – “The Fairest of the Seasons” …Yes and the morning has me/Looking in your eyes/And seeing mine warning me/To read the signs carefully…
Love for and thanks to AB… “Now that I’ve tried/Now that I’ve finally found that this is not the way”. 02 Brigid Mae Power – “Let Me Go Now”
Heartbreaking. “It was just too hard to love unconditionally/you can let me go now, that’s okay/it was just too hard to love in that way” 03 Belle & Sebastian – “Nobody’s Empire”
Glasgow love. “There was a girl that sang like the chime of a bell/And she put out her arm and she touched me when I was in hell” 04 Feu! Chatterton – “Grace”
The French past. “Le tendre passé qui nous hante/Croît comme un jardin vivant/Un terrain vague/Peuplé de très vieux mirages/De fleurs sauvages” 05 Akofa Akoussah – “I Tcho Tchass”
Tales of Togo and Togolese radio 06 Lower Dens – “Your Heart Still Beating”
“Your heart is still beating in all of my dreams/And I swore again and again/Never again” 07 The Helio Sequence – “Deuces” …now I’m gone/you’ve lost your hold on me…
PNW. “I don’t wanna be cool, I don’t wanna be distant/Or harbor grief for you/And I don’t mean to be cool, I don’t need to seem never like/I’m holding out for you” 08 Tortoise – “Yonder Blue” …Oh, I’ll fill the ocean with tears until I find you… 09 Gentle Hen – “The People You See Regularly Never Grow Old”
Hold them horses, hen. 10 Twerps – “Dreamin”
Australia/Melbourne 11 The Communards – “Don’t Leave Me This Way”
Glasgow disco. SD 12 BC Unidos, Shungudzo – “Ouagadougou” 13 Belly – “Superconnected”
Memories of driving-around singalong sessions with dear Tara in the mid-90s and our continued connection 14 Alberteen – “Infant Nation”
Thanks to inimitable AB 15 Silver Apples – “I Have Known Love” 16 Veronika Boulytcheva, Natalia Ermilova – “Ouj i ja li moloda”
A song that hurts most people’s ears – reminds me of college and my dad saying this sounds like ”wailing Chinese people” 17 Yo La Tengo – ”Pablo and Andrea” …someone came and took all the roses away…
“I’ll cover for you like a slipcover covers a chair” 18 Geowulf – “Greatest Fool”
Aussies in London. “Point at me and laugh, my love/’Cause I thought we were enough/Guess I make the greatest fool/Gentlemen, I’ll humor you” 19 Julian Cope – “Sunspots” …I’m in love with my very best friend…
Back to high school and the nightmare “environmental camp” I went to one year trying to make a friend feel better 20 Hoshi – “Comment je vais faire” (acoustic version) 21 Alabama Shakes – “Dunes” …Somewhere in me, a memory that I cannot gather anymore… 22 Delta 5 – “Mind Your Own Business”
Words of wisdom 23 Diane Coffee – “Hymn”
“So come on, walk to your house/You put a record on”. Afternoons after school listening to records, love to my school friends (Terra, Leighanne, Gary) 24 Sugar Candy Mountain – “Atlas” 25 Lost Horizons – “The Places We’ve Been”
Vocals by Karen Peris from The Innocence Mission 26 Cinerama – “Tie Me Up”
“You own me, you own me, and I’m not arguing” 27 Emily King – “Sleepwalker”
“I feel my body move without me again/Ooh, like a sleepwalker getting closer to him” 28 Tracy Chapman – “Smoke and Ashes”
Reminds me of the interminable summer of 1996 29 The Stone Roses – “Love Spreads”
I never cared much for this Roses song, but after seeing it live, it took on a different feeling 30 of Montreal – “Last Rites at the Jane Hotel” …These tears I cry for you must prove that I’m not the demon that I’m meant to be…
“Other people can be so disappointing/I need to spend more time alone” 31 A Taste of Honey – “Boogie Oogie Oogie”
For SD, as all danceable tunes are 32 Bam Spacey – “Avstånd och skog”
Malmö. 33 Heather Nova – “What a Feeling”
“Life is only half way in our hands/Years have passed while I was making plans/And I could never find the words/I always felt absurd, and always outside” 34 Kalbells – “Alonetime” …life can be so emotional/when you’re lonely…
Springtime. Here’s cheers to Annette, AB, SD, J, Anne 35 Fastbacks – “I Never Knew”
The old Seattle haunts and sounds; Oslo tunnels 36 Brandi Carlile – “Sugartooth”
Locals 37 Olden Yolk – “Cut to the Quick” 38 Low – “Let’s Stay Together”
Because yes, sometimes, people do stay together 39 Indigo Girls – “Kid Fears”
It’s like junior high school again, and somehow makes me think of Amie 40 Bedouine – “Summer Cold” …You say, ‘What have they done to you friend?’…
Armenian-American via Aleppo. “I’ve had enough of your guns and your ammunition” 41 Orange Juice – “Untitled Melody”
Glasgow. “You need me more or less, I need you more and more” 42 Belly – “Judas My Heart”
“Where I live/There’s a blanket of sighs and it covers the stars/In my heart, I’m as hungry as ever” 43 Madeline Kenney – “Signals”
“A signal is what you use in your car, dude. Not a way of communicating with someone who clearly needs direct answers.” 44 Sevdaliza – “Amandine Insensible” …There’s a woman, she’s every fantasy/And no reality in one…
“How can I suffer without the pain?/Can we struggle without the shame?” 45 Dori Freeman – “Cold Waves” …There’s something bitter and it’s tyin’ up my tongue/My body’s restless but I’ve got nowhere to run…
“I’ve got a lover and he loves me very well/He took my broken heart and brought it back from hell/And with the slightest glance and movement he can tell/That I am lost and only he can lift the veil” 46 Deep Throat Choir – “In My Bed” Amy Winehouse cover 47 Aidan Moffat, RM Hubbert, feat. Siobhan Wilson – “Cockcrow”
Scotland 48 Salad – “Warmth of the Hearth” …Here comes the hearth/We’re almost there baby/I’m on the path/Missing you already…
One of those bands that never quite hit (I loved them) but has reunited to tour recently 49 Julia Lucille – “Lie and Wait” …What do you think should we take it slow/Or go as fast as my body wants to go…
“Wrapped up in your loving arms imperfect as I am/You don’t tell me I’m beautiful, you tell me I’m a badass but/I hold back my love” … “What do you think was it too much too soon/I felt your mind just leaving when I walked into the room”. I like almost nothing more than I like Julia Lucille these days. 50 The Go-Betweens – “Dive For Your Memory”
“When I hear you saying/That we stood no chance/I’ll dive for your memory/We stood that chance”
It comes just slightly early – the April random gum soundtrack. I also think I will be sending out a few copies on CD (along with the previous few months’ music) in postal form because there are a handful of people who need more candy.
01 Negative Gemini – You Never Knew …now you’re pretending that i’m someone you never knew…
For all the beautiful negative Geminis 02 Gianna Lauren – Mistakes …Mistakes, they are my own…
Thank you to Esteban 03 ABC – All of My Heart …What’s it like to have loved and to lose that much?…
Thanks to J 04 Vorderhaus – Tanz Tanz Tanz oder ich bin verloren
Thanks to ML & Inken 05 The Jack Moves – Doublin’ Down 06 Mark Gaetani – Rwanda
With Rwanda on my mind 07 The Aislers Set – Cocksure Whistler …Showers icy but the streets are chalk/Like the cocksure whistler’s on a winter walk… 08 Fine Young Cannibals – She Drives Me Crazy
For SD and to memories of Terra and her insistence that she would like to stick her tongue between Roland Gift’s front teeth 09 Katie Von Schleicher – Baby Don’t Go 10 Kelley Stoltz – Kim Chee Taco Man …Let your grace go wild…
“You’re not alone… You know the smile is real/It’s something you can feel/The stars with twisted teeth/Not so out of reach!” For Martina: “The Kim Chee Taco Man/The real Mexican” 11 Lushes – Low Hanging Fruit
For Annette and our dislike for low-hanging fruit preachers with deer-in-the-headlights eyes 12 Mugison – Patrick Swayze …there’s a ghost living here in the scrapyard…
For SD, the Swayze gym and the way Scottish people talk, even over strange Icelandic soundtracks 13 Jane Weaver – I Wish …I wish you were cool/I wish you were something…
MP. “So you really did nothing/So you really did nothing of concern?/In the distance I’m humming/Are the whispers nothing?” 14 Olivia Newton-John – Hopelessly Devoted to You
Sing-song singalongs with SD 15 Negative Gemini – Don’t Worry Bout the Fuck I’m Doing
“I don’t care about your shit face, the street goes down two ways, Don’t worry bout the way I’m going” 16 Belle and Sebastian – Poor Boy
True words. “Poor boy, I could never live up to your imagination/Poor boy, I was a crush that killed” 17 Emma Lee Toyoda – Nünü 18 Indeep – Last Night a DJ Saved My Life
SD and locker-room recordings 19 Feu! Chatterton – L’oiseau
Merci, Laurent. 20 Karen Marks – Cold Café …on the esplanade/my coffee’s gone cold/I won’t forget the sounds/you left me…
Australia. 21 Robyn Hitchcock – Godnatt Oslo 22 Cat Power – Nude as the News
Memories of Seattle, Naomi and the Finn from Funland 23 Ösp Eldjárn – Ástarnetið
Thanks to and love for Eva 24 Maggie Björklund – The Road to Samarkand
Danmark 25 Veronika Boulytcheva, Natalia Ermilova – Зачем тебя я, милый мой, узнала …И сердце песню радости поет…
For J. This ‘relic’ from the college years pops into my head now and then. I had to dig through all my old CDs to find it. 26 Houndstooth – Bliss Boat …words are just a poor man’s pennies, dear…
Portlanders. I love the sound of this. “My aching heart/my wounded knee/you were the only air I breathe” 27 Kon Kan – I Beg Your Pardon (I Never Promised You a Rose Garden)
Thinking back to being 13 and the people populating that period 28 Clara Luciani – Comme toi
“J’ai le coeur qu s’égare en attendant que toi/Qui me ressemble tant, qui ne me comprend pas” 29 The Sundays – God Made Me
“We’d love to be good but we’d rather be bad/But how was I supposed to know that?” 30 Scott Fagan – In My Head 31 Martha Ffion – We Disappear …guess we never really knew how good we were…
Irish in Glasgow 🙂 32 Velly Joonas – Kaes On Aeg
Estonia 33 YACHT – I Thought the Future Would Be Cooler
“Got my broken heart—/I got it sold right back to me—/By an algorithmic social entity!” 34 Widowspeak – Dead Love (So Still) …Even if it wasn’t as good/If it didn’t hurt so bad to remember… 35 The True Loves – The Dirty
Seattle, you know… 36 Martin Courtney – Airport Bar …I can pass the time/But I can’t undo the changes once they’re made…
“Life in that dream was just what it seemed/If I knew then what I know now I would not have stayed” 37 Cate Le Bon – Aside from Growing Old
“What’s the hubbub, I’m losing my mind/I’m running from people/What’s the measure of a passing time/I’m, I’m running from people/Deep seated inconsequence/Still running from people” 38 Fleetwood Mac – The Chain …And if you don’t love me now/You will never love me again…
For Erin 39 Vendredi sur Mer – L’amour avec toi 40 Laura Marling – Gurdjieff’s Daughter …Darkness can’t do you harm/Fear will hurt you…
“Man is made in such a way that he is never so much attached to anything as he is to his suffering.” –Gurdjieff 41 The History of Apple Pie – Keep Wondering
I keep wondering about some never-tasted mysterious apple pie 42 Jane Weaver – Slow Motion …I want to feel the life we loved in the sun,/Slow motion…
“Let’s get together/We keep changing/Sometimes everything’s amazing/Then the silence/Reminds us we are lost/Stop listening/To other people/Whose agenda/Doesn’t seem good/Then exception is the only/Thing we’ve got.” 43 Dan Deacon – Feel the Lightning …I try not to worry/But I always worry… 44 Belle and Sebastian – Lazy Line Painter Jane …Being a rebel’s fine/But you go all the way/To being brutal…
Missing my Jane 45 Crybaby – When the Lights Go Out …There’s a beauty in this/A privilege in parting I know… 46 Meshell Ndegeocello – Waterfalls
A Meshell take on someone else’s song that somehow outshines the original. Love to Anne 47 Strawberry Runners – Dog Days 48 Jessica Lea Mayfield – Sorry is Gone …Leave me alone, but I want you with me every minute… 49 Damien Jurado, Richard Swift – Radioactivity 50 Veronika Boulytcheva, Natalia Ermilova – Вьюн над водой
Here we go… music for March, which is the most wintry month of all this year. Check out the whole playlist on Spotify.
marching on march 2018 – the good goo of random gum
01 Saint Etienne – “Nothing Can Stop Us”
*For poor deported, beloved Ben, who will nevertheless not be stopped; love for Tara, as this was one of our signature soundtrack songs when we used to spend time together 02 Negative Gemini – “You Weren’t There Anymore” ...you didn’t care at all…
*For at least those Gemini souls among us who are as negative as we’re accused of being 03 Vanishing Twin – “Choose Your Own Adventure” 04 Claudine Longet – “God Only Knows” 05 Neko Case – “Star Witness” 06 Los Zucara – “Lamento de Febrero”
*Uruguay. Love for J, Billy and Travis 07 Gwenno – “Tir Ha Mor”
*Wales 08 The Fall – “Mexico Wax Solvent”
*Love for Naomi – everything’s gonna be okay. (Must play LOUD) 09 Them Are Us Too – “The Problem with Redheads”
*Martina: Maybe Joel was right about the internet obsession with redheads. Haha. Sadly, one of the band members was among the dead in 2016 warehouse fire in Oakland, CA. 10 Dear Nora – “To Fall is Not to Fail”
“It’s better not to cry/Or to look me in the eye/When you leave and you let it go” 11 Yorkston/Thorne/Khan – “False True Piya” 12 Nicole Atkins – “Darkness Falls So Quiet” 13 Sexores – “Berlin”
*Despite being from Ecuador, this is one of two “Berlin”s on this mix. Sometimes I’m still missing it. Hard to believe it was already more than a year ago that I dashed off to Berlin for an afternoon just to see a movie, returning home the same night.
14 Julia Lucille – “Beneath the Spring” …Can a woman love/and not lose herself?…
*The countless onslaught of talented Julias continues. “We’ve had some fun/We’ve had some good loving/On to the next thing/My conscience forcibly brings/So many things that I could do/One of them being you/The slow slide into lying/And here come endless apologizing” 15 Beach House – “Chariot” 16 Pérez Prado – “Mambo No 5”
*A curious, out-of-place thing that reminds me of the misery of being 19 17 Siobhan Wilson – “Whatever Helps”…you’re stuck in the break of a wave/you’re haunted by a line from a song/you’re beaten by the wing of a prayer/try to move on…
*Glasgow. “Whatever helps to pass the time/when you’re on the other side/Switch it off, switch it off, whatever it is/That bleeds out all your best thoughts” 18 Thao & the Get Down Stay Down – “The Evening” 19 Tennis – “My Emotions Are Blinding”
*Love to Esteban & Ana 20 Laura Groves – “Friday”…You never gave a sign of pieced together phrases that Ive heard… 21 Beach Fossils – “This Year” ...This year I told myself it’d be a better one/Try not to fall back onto the knife… 22 The Raincoats – “Lola” 23 Ramona Lisa – “Arcadia Reprise” 24 Franska Trion – “Empty Space” *Sverige, Sverige, Sverige 25 Gorillaz – “Clint Eastwood” *Thinking more of Digit the gorilla, Mike, and Jesse Dude (another plastic gorilla, featured in the main image), but also Filbert/Ph’s fleeting flirtation with ‘fame’ via Clint Eastwood. The strange world of models and film extras… 26 Pink Mountaintops – “I (fuck) Mountains” 27 Charlotte Adigéry – “Senegal Seduction” 28 The Luxembourg Signal – “Laura Palmer” 29 The Fall – “Pumpkin Soup and Mashed Potatoes” *When you need a dose of pumpkin soup to go with your fix of The Fall 30 Anika – “I Go to Sleep” 31 Jitka Zelenková – “Rád” *Another Czech check-in, which means … love to Anne & to Martina 32 CCFX – “The One to Wait” 33 Katie von Schleicher – “Life’s a Lie” 34 Andrea Davidson – “Thank You Fuck You” …thank you for what we went through/and fuck you for something, too/I’m done with you… 35 Negative Gemini – “Ice Sluts” *Lóa: Is an ‘ice slut’ a cross between a ice queen and a fuck mattress? 🙂 36 Pale Saints – “Half-Life Remembered” …It’s eating you away and some will never know it’s taste… *O, emotional waves of late teen years. It’s like sitting in traffic-safety class in high school, the long drive to university, and more crying jags that I can count: “Biting off more than you can chew again/You’re just a child/And all you know is/That it’s sweetness brings you close to tears/Each time you can’t resist/And some will never know it’s taste” 37 Belle & Sebastian – “The Party Line”
*A spontaneous leap one day, deciding to go see B & S after many years of wanting to. And it was as lovely as I needed it to be. (And come on now, gotta love Glaswegian bands to bits.) 38 Gentle Hen – “I Wasn’t Looking for This” *Thinking mostly about the use of “hen” as a Scottish term for a woman: “Gie us a kiss, hen“. “I wasn’t looking for this/I wasn’t ready for this/But it’s so convenient, I don’t have to do a thing/And I’ve always been lazy at best” 39 Meshell Ndegeocello – “Sometimes It Snows in April”…Springtime was always my favorite time of year/A time for lovers holding hands in the rain…
*Meshell doing Prince. For Anne, whom I must see in April. 40 Hanne Hukkelberg – “Berlin”
*Norway... merci, Andreas 41 Madonna – “Crazy for You” *Ended up here in some roundabout way after mentioning to S that Matthew Modine‘s daughter, Ruby, is in the US version of Shameless; he said he can only remember an 80s movies starring Modine that had this song in the soundtrack but couldn’t actually remember the movie (Vision Quest, of course, about wrestling… “God, you can count. See, I knew you had to be smart to be a wrestler.” –The Breakfast Club) 42 Kate Bush – “The Kick Inside”
*I fully, firmly believed I would never, ever appreciate Kate Bush. I have tried so many times over the years, and I just couldn’t hear it. Then suddenly in February, it was the right moment. More proof that we do change, and our tastes can in fact become more expansive rather than contractive. 43 10,000 Maniacs – “Trouble Me” …Why let your shoulders bend underneath this burden when my back is sturdy and strong?…
*And with the inclusion of this song, which I have never liked, we devolve (further) into the world of adult-contemporary, near-easy-listening. I remember my anger in 1989 when this song displaced The Cure from some top-five-of-the-week on some MTV show. Seems hilarious that I cared so much. I thought of this again recently when someone said, “I’ll trouble you later” and I said, “You could never trouble me.” 44 Crowded House – “She Goes On” …Pretty soon you’ll be able to remember her/lying in the garden singing/right where she’ll always be/the door is always open/this is the place that I loved her/and these are the friends that she had/long may the mountain ring/to the sound of her laughter/and she goes on and on…
*RIP Margaret, who died on 16 February 2018; “til we see her once again/in a world without end…” 45 The Sundays – “When I’m Thinking About You”
*Remembering the varied tastes of Mr Watts when we used to talk and he remembered weird folks like me 46 Pink Martini, The von Trapps – “Rwanda Nziza”
*Dreams of, thoughts on Rwanda 47 Cowboy Junkies – “Come Calling (Her Song)”
*One of those songs that, catching me at the right moment, makes me cry, remembering exactly where I was when I heard it, repeatedly, in one of the worst times of my life 48 Jane Weaver – “I Need a Connection”
*Opening act for Belle & Sebastian – when deciding whether to go spontaneously to see them, seeing that Weaver was opening, that tipped the balance and made me decide to go 49 Sarah Klang – “Milky Way”
*Gothenburg love 50 Shamir – “Lived and Died Alone” …I resign myself to the fact/that I will always love/never to be loved back…
*A beautiful ending, sad sentiments
February has historically been a month of inaction and hibernation for me – this one has been no exception. Last year I did jump on a plane to Berlin on a whim just to see a movie, and ended up in a mild debate with someone about the Holocaust while I was having lunch in a Jewish restaurant. Hmm. Seriously. It was a cold but bright day, and I was glad I had broken out of my routine to do something completely different, unexpected and spontaneous.
I had no intention of doing anything similar this year, but today I happened to see that Belle & Sebastian is in Oslo, so I quickly bought a ticket, got a train ticket and head over to Oslo in the afternoon. It’s not quite the distance of Berlin or somewhere further afield, but it’s still something (a band) I’ve wanted to see forever, especially as I have Glasgow so much on my mind these days. Bonus: Jane Weaver opens! Brilliant. Two birds, you know…
Any other day I might have ignored this urge to go, but I had a dream last night in which I kept wanting to do things but kept putting them off, and I started writing a poem in the dream, which I never had a chance to finish before someone would interrupt and drag me off somewhere:
If I light a fire, I will stay warm. If I light a fire around myself, there will be no way back.
In dreams, never going where I want to go, but always with a fistful of melting popsicles.
01 The Supremes – Love is Like an Itching in My Heart
“Just an itching in my heart and I can’t scratch it” 02 Cate le Bon – Are You With Me Now? 03 Margo Price – Hands of Time
“Turn back the clock on the cruel hands of time” 04 Nana – Menino Carioca 05 Mary Lou Lord – I’m Ahead If I Can Quit While I’m Behind 06 BC Camplight – You Should’ve Gone to School 07 Sandie Shaw – (There’s) Always Something There to Remind Me 08 Sibylle Baier – Softly
Here’s to hidden women making their belated mark 09 Grizzly Bear – Losing All Sense
“Like a rogue wave you/Wash right over me/Losing all sense of what my body could feel/I was able to drift away from here/I have lost all control” 10 Gingerlys – Incandescent 11 BRONCHO – What 12 Sofia Freire – Canção da Bruxa 13 Dita von Teese, Sébastien Tellier – Bird of Prey 14 Marta Kubišová – Už se léto schovává
…Hang up the Czech habit. Love to Anne, to Martina, to Mr MI 15 Claudine Longet – Medley: Jealous Guy/Don’t Let Me Down 16 Belle & Sebastian – I’ll Be Your Pilot
All the Glaswegians 17 Nap Eyes – Delirium and Persecution Paranoia 18 Angel Olsen – How Many Disasters 19 The Supremes – Forever Came Today 20 The Barry Sisters – Vyoch Tyoch Tyoch
Can’t resist a Yiddish song, now can we? 21 Tommy Allen – Ghosts in the Walls 22 The Fall – There’s a Ghost in My House
RIP Mark E. Smith – who seems like the type to linger as a ghost in another dimension, tormenting people for all eternity from the beyond. 23 Jenny O. – Lazy Jane…I’m feeling blue/Cause I can’t have you…
“I’m never gonna be a cheerleader/I can’t do tricks/And I ain’t that sick”. For all those so far away now I will never get them back 24 Emma Gatrill – Odd Ones Out
“Don’t judge a book by its cover/Its façade is simple, simple to see/But by twenty pages in/You’ll find the story is not what it first seemed” 25 Over the Rhine – Latter Days 26 Al Masrieen – Men Awel Deqiqa 27 The Fall – Feeling Numb
One can only feel numb at the passing of Mark E. Smith (RIP), knowing the end probably could easily have come earlier. Still, the only good thing about his death is that I have learned about so many more people in my circles who are fans of The Fall, and I might never otherwise have known. 28 Hollie Cook – Desdemona 29 Emahoy Tsegué-Maryam Guébrou – The Homeless Wanderer
Ethiopia 30 The Fall – Big New Prinz
I didn’t think much about how The Fall served as a soundtrack thread through most of my life until the recent passing of the cantankerous Mark E. Smith. All the way back to my adolescence, when my friend Terra and I would be sucked in by the aggressive sounds of “Big New Prinz” (and the rest of the songs from the same album), and not too long thereafter when my bricklayer pen pal Peter in the north of England would send me mixed cassettes that included loads of The Fall. And then how Naomi and I would share this connection and even see The Fall together many, many years ago. The Fall continued to help me forge surprising connections through the years. 31 Renata Zeiguer – Follow Me Down 32 Duke Garwood – Blue 33 France Gall – Laisse tomber les filles 34 Mattiel – Whites of Their Eyes 35 Yo La Tengo – I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry 36 Slow Club – In Waves
“You can’t tell me you’re not like this/Staring down the pages of the shit you’ve missed/Hoping you’ll find a way to change/Days spent waiting in my living grave” 37 Julia Lucille – Darkening
Such pretty sounds “As I’m darkening I must go alone” 38 Brigitte Fontaine – Une fois mais pas deux 39 Ofege – It’s Not Easy
Nigeria 40 Luwten – Pinball
“I am the pinball/I am the deer/I hear the shot/I disappear” 41 Mogwai – I’m Jim Morrison, I’m Dead
“Jim Morrison… Van Morrison more like!” For S (naturally with an additional nod to Glasgow in Mogwai) 42 Wooden Wand – Mexican Coke
Martina! You know if it’s Mexican I will tag you! 43 The Fall – British People in Hot Weather
I had been an avid anglophile as a kid/adolescent, and I don’t really know what happened to make me so negative on the English. Still, The Fall has been something of a ‘negative soundtrack’ all along. 44 De Lux – When Your Life Feels Like a Loss 45 Ramona Lisa – Dominic
“Forgive me if I was too forward too fast” 46 The Fall – Powder Keg
And what else is the world today than a powder keg? 47 Sexores – Bluish Lovers
Ecuador 48 The Supremes – Someday We’ll Be Together …but will we? 49 The Psychedelic Furs – Sister Europe
“Words are all just useless sound” … for all my Furs friends 50 Tori Amos – Josephine 51 Cowboy Junkies – Cowboy Junkies Lament
Memories of college-era road trip with my Russian class, all long disappeared, all of us singing together in that fleeting moment of closeness. And the long, lost Townes van Zandt, who wrote this song for the Cowboy Junkies. “There’s a hole in heaven where some sin slips through/Close your eyes and dream real steady/Maybe just a little will spill on you” 52 Al Green – How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?
“I could never see tomorrow/I was never told about the sorrow” 53 The Cranberries – No Need to Argue
RIP Dolores O’Riordan. I remember listening to this song on repeat one year during college – it had such a sad, resigned finality to it that resonated with me (as I greeted endings, particularly of relationships with this kind of sad resignation. I have never been the type to really “freak out” and go crazy). This seemed like the perfect anthem for that kind of sad acceptance. Much as we must go forward with sad acceptance when people die too soon.
There aren’t many people who read this or even people in my life who will know who Mark E. Smith was. He died at age 60. Surprised it did not happen earlier. But my god, could I ever have imagined how influential The Fall would be to me … since I was 12/13? How vast the influence of people who have been in my life who also felt that The Fall meant something to them?
01 Grace Lightman – Halloween is Over
Because Halloween really is over 02 Inspiral Carpets – This is How It Feels
Lonely and nostalgic 03 Robyn Hitchcock – Raining Twilight Coast
“Just one thing, baby, you forgot my heart”. Glasgow in May 04 Soccer Mommy – Switzerland
“i trace and memorize your curves and lines until my fingers start to bleed
we could go some place alone
don’t you see
we could go somewhere it snows
just you and me
we could go to switzerland
never come back home again “ 05 Calypso Valois – Amoureuse 06 Luwten – Double for Me…You don’t want to need but need to know what you want/You think that if you need too much you’ll end up with none…
“What you said is not what you meant
You haven’t quite figured it out yet” 07 Lykke Li – Love Me Like I’m Not Made of Stone
Sweden 08 Nap Eyes – Alaskan Shake
Nova Scotia 09 Moonface, Siinai – The Nightclub Artiste
Pretty prolific Canadian from delightful British Columbia 10 Elvis Perkins – While You Were Sleeping 11 Niobe – Hawaii Duet 12 Summer Aviation – Thrust
Old friends 13 Nana – Gato é Crime, Denuncie
meow… meow… 14 DRINKS – Hermits on Holiday
For beloved grumpy would-be hermits and mugwumps 15 The Amazing – Perfect Day for Shrimp
Why, Swedish, of course… 16 Black Marble – Iron Lung 17 Vashti Bunyan – If I Were
A name-dropping opportunity 18 Lily & Madeleine – Devil We Know…Come the memories, come the shivering cold, let the rain fall…
Better the liar you know… 19 Fats Domino – Every Night About This Time
RIP – 2017 20 Al-Masrieen – Asef Gedan
Egypt. Cheers to Aurélien and Cat 21 Moon Palace – Shapeshifter
Is a person a liar or just a shapeshifter? …Seattle 22 Sylvia Striplin – You Can’t Turn Me Away 23 The Third Bardo – I’m Five Years Ahead of My Time 24 Clap Your Hands Say Yeah – The Pilot…A tough-love motherfucker, who was born a clown…
“What could I say? What was I after?
I forgot, but you figured it out for me again with your radio silence” 25 Sevdaliza – The Language of Limbo
Iranian-Dutch 26 Over the Rhine – Faithfully Dangerous
Memories of the 1990s. “I wonder which part of this will leave a scar”. Ohio. 27 LCD Soundsystem – Emotional Haircut
Glasgow in May? 28 Anchorsong – Butterflies 29 David Cassidy – I Think I Love You
RIP – 2017 30 Cults – Right Words 31 An Luu – Pourquoi tu me fous plus des coups? 32 Christopher Owens – Heroine (Got Nothing on You) 33 St Vincent – Sugarboy 34 Sébastien Tellier – Drunk on the Radio 35 Luwten – Indifference
Netherlands 36 Maggie Rogers – Alaska (acoustic)
“And I walked off you
And I walked off an old me” 37 Kyu Sakamoto – Sukiyaki
The old days: Japan 38 Laibach – Drzava
Slovenia 39 Otis Redding – That’s How Strong My Love Is
You can’t not love Otis 40 Eivør – Salt
Much love to very music-loving colleague, Eva
“langt burtur úr landi
hómi eg gráan av minnum
lati aldurnar taka meg
føli djúphavið darra
havið er í mær
er saltið í tárunum” 41 Tropic of Cancer – The Dull Age 42 Helado Negro – Lengua Larga
Ecuador-USA
“Abre tu boca que quiero conocer
Adentro
Y hay un gran vacío
Conocido” 43 Sound of Ceres – Gemini Scenic
For twins of all kinds: birthday twins, astrological twins, lost twins 44 Patio Furniture – Please, Please, Please Let me get what I want
A song for the hardy, sturdy patio furniture 45 Neşe Alkan – Kaçma Güzel
Turkiye 46 Acetone – Shaker 47 Aimee Mann – Knock It Off…You had your chances but now they’re gone…
“Seattle finally couldn’t hold her” 48 Summer Aviation – Angle of Attack
Old friends, lovely sounds 49 Coparck – A Dog and Pony Show
Netherlands
Martina! Here’s to, if not the end of dog and pony shows, at least new and exciting ones 50 Shura – Nothing’s Real
“I’m a dead girl walking
I need medicine” 51 Salma Agha – Barish Men Main Khari 52 Natalia Lafourcade – No Más Llorar
Mexico
“No más llorar
Sé que ya lo nuestro no tiene remedio
Pero no más llorar” 53 Anna Burch – Tea-Soaked Letter
Detroit
“I forgot to fake
The way that I was feeling
I guess it’s too late
Now all my cards are showing” 54 Malena Zavala – Should I Try (acoustic)
Argentina 55 Mdou Moctar – Iblis Amghar
Tuareg/Niger 56 Softer Still – 1993
England, of course 57 Ages and Ages – How It Feels
Portland, Oregon 58 Jaws of Love – Love Me Like I’m Gone
Thanks, with love, to Andreas 59 Heartless Bastards – Marathon
Cincinnati (why are people always surprised that Ohio has not only a bunch of cities but a ton of bands?). Not my kind of marathon, but okay… 60 Marta Kubišová – Cesta
Requisite Czech. Love to Martina, dearest Anne and Mr MI 61 P.P. Arnold – Medicated Goo
Good goo of random gum and love and life 62 Hatchie – Sure
Australia 63 Mattiel – Not Today
“Everything’s okay – but maybe not today” 64 Cinnamon Tapes – Cinnamon Sea
São Paulo. 65 France Gall – Les sucettes
RIP – 2018 66 Xenoula – Tororoi
South Africa/Wales 67 Essaie Pas – Futur Parlé
Montréal, bien sûr 68 Jonathan Bree, Clara Viñals – Say You Love Me Too
Thanks to Tom 69 Julia Holter – Don’t Make Me Over
The simplicity of this song makes me overly emotional
“Don’t make me over
Now that I can’t make it without you” 70 Angel Olsen – Fly On Your Wall
“I found a feeling inside
Or should I say it found me
I turned into someone I
Never imagined I’d be”
Thinking of the woods, I think of so many things. From Sleater-Kinney‘s album, The Woods, which carried me aimlessly on foot through all of Reykjavik in the sad spring of 2008, to the present surroundings, wooden entanglements in wooded environs I’ve been rooted in and uprooted from, the things that I’ve shaken off like so many pine needles but which still stick like sap…
It took me a really long time to read Louise Erdrich. Apart from the handful of poems I’d read just after high school, I’d had an aversion to Erdrich, seemingly only because a girl with whom I’d almost silently feuded/had a misplaced dislike toward, was a huge fan. The girl cited Erdrich constantly as a source of inspiration (the girl referred to herself with replete and self-satisfied airy tones as a “writer”). As I read somewhere the other day, you either are or are not a writer. Talking about it doesn’t do anything. (I, too, am a writer, but it’s a bit like Catherine Keener‘s abrasive character in the now-20-year-old (!) Your Friends and Neighbors, when asked if she had written anything another character would have read, “Not unless you read the instructions on your tampon box.”)
I got over the Erdrich thing, and my misdirected dislike for the girl, but still never got around to reading Erdrich’s wealth of fiction. Now I’ve read most of her body of work (recommend some, like The Master Butchers Singing Club, and not so much others)…
At one time your touches were clothing enough.
Within these trees now I am different.
Now I wear the woods.
I lower a headdress of bent sticks and secure it.
I strap to myself a breastplate of clawed, roped bark.
I fit the broad leaves of sugar maples
to my hands, like mittens of blood.
Now when I say ‘come,’
and you enter the woods,
hunting some creature like the woman I was,
I surround you.
Light bleeds from the clearing. Roots rise.
Fluted molds burn blue in the falling light,
and you also know
the loneliness that you taught me with your body.
When you lie down in the grave of a slashed tree,
I cover you, as I always did.
Only this time you do not leave.
Giving thanks: “November came at last…” “Eight billion zeroes is still zero/If you got no heart” Random gum – November 2017
Listen on Spotify. Find some of the tracks below for download (which are not available on Spotify). Or request a physical copy – I’m not doing the large-scale CD burning/package endeavor en masse any longer, but if anyone wants a physical copy and a package with some random candy in it, please comment (will leave the comment private).
1. This is the Kit – “Les Plus Beaux” 2. I Was a King – “Frozen Disease”…November came at last…
Discovered while seeing Robyn Hitchcock in Oslo in October. Lovely Norwegians 3. Michou – “Maloya ton tisane”
Maybe the only time I’ll include a singer from Réunion… 4. Jessie Ware – “Selfish Love”…why do I do these things/I break you down just to get my way/darling you do it too/you tell me lies and I bend the truth… 5. Marjan – “Kavire Del”
In Iran again 6. Whitesnake – “Here I Go Again”
Nothing I thought I would ever include, but – as he does – SD randomly added it to his ‘repertoire’ and started singing it on the regular to make me laugh… and well, here it is. And it truly is the right song for him. 7. Robyn Hitchcock – “The Abyss”…I don’t know what is true/but my compass points to you/when it’s quivering like this/in the abyss…
For J. Finally got to see Hitchcock in Oslo in October after 30 years of waiting and wanting… 8. Vorderhaus – “Minor Activity”…love and regret I’ll never truly forget… 9. The Cry – “Alone” …With a piece of paper as blank as night and the words don’t seem to come out right and you ask yourself again is this for me?… 10. Mai Lệ Huyền – “Có Ai Trên Đời Mà Không Yêu
Seems to go along with all the Vietnam-related stuff around me now (the Ken Burns documentary, the fiction I read just before that by Bao Ninh and the memoir by Tim O’Brien earlier in the year) 11. Chastity Belt – “Caught in a Lie”…I’ll take a shot of whatever you’ve got/But it’s not going down that easily…
Walla Walla. Thoughts of M 12. Laser & bas – “Spela Shoreline”
Sweden, of course 13. Orange Juice – “Rip It Up”…I hope to God you’re not as dumb as you make out…
Glasgow classic 14. Velvet Condom – “Samt und Stein” 15. Throbbing Gristle – “Hot on the Heels of Love” 16. The Sonics – “Psycho”…Tell me baby/Am I just your clown?…
1960s Tacoma. For SD, cut-out marionette 17. Crybaby – “I Cherish the Heartbreak More than the Love that I Lost”…a happy ever after, well, baby/it just wasn’t us… 18. Ariel Pink, Weyes Blood – “On Another Day”…now the soft attraction has gone…
“She’ll swear some weak excuse/To gain more time/Changing sides like friends/To satisfy her quicksand ego/When life falls short again/She’ll crawl away” 19. Promised Land Sound – “She Takes Me There”…it seems she’ll never let me in/like emotion is a sin…
Nashville 20. Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers – “Asshole” …she’ll do anything to make you feel like an asshole…
RIP Tom Petty; always think of the scene in the old sitcom Wings when the character Lowell claims that Tom Petty is the world’s handsomest man… 21. Cults – “I Can Hardly Make You Mine”…Still I lead on the days/like a loaded gun…
“But I know you’re not the one or the only/But we both know what it’s like to be lonely” 22. Jean-Louis Murat – “À mendiante rousse”*
I can never get enough of these musical treatments of Baudelaire 23. Beyond the Wizard’s Sleeve – “Diagram Girl” 24. The Pastels – “Nothing to Be Done” …I’m ready for you, sweetheart/Now my mind is open wide…
More Glasgow, of course, and truth: “Remember what was meant to be this year/The past is a disaster/And the future’s coming faster now” 25. Otis Redding – “These Arms of Mine”
I dare you to not love Otis 26. Cigarettes After Sex – “I’m a Firefighter”
Wandering Oslo with Annette on a day when firefighters were everywhere; joking about chasing fireman cock for lunch, remembering Yoga Fireman from so many years ago 27. Alex Chilton – “Hey! Little Child” 28. Men I Trust – “Tailwhip”…I’m happy as I am/cause I’m leaving…
Montréal. “This country dog won’t die in the city” 29. Lia Pamina – “Cards on the Table”…I hide away from close encounters/I never let my feelings be known/I’d rather burrow deep into my hole…
Spain! What in the hell is going on in Spain? For J 30. Roy Orbison – “The Comedians”…it’s always something cruel that laughter drowns…
An Elvis Costello tune recorded by Roy Orbison; my mom and I have always joked about this song (especially the “who held the lever that could bring me down” lyric) even though it is quite sad 31. Bedřich Smetana, Wiener Philharmoniker– “The Bartered Bride, JB 1:100: Dance of the Comedians”
Czech Czech Czech. Love for Anne, Martina. Reminds me so much of Academic Decathlon in high school – love for Mike, Amanda, Terra, Leighanne, etc. 32. Nahid Akhtar – “Dil To Kya Cheez Hai” 33. Bubblegum Lemonade – “The Only Constant is Change”
Another constant: Glasgow 34. Camper Van Beethoven – “Sweethearts”
Like a slice of junior high school: “McDonnell-Douglas olive drab/They bear the names of our sweethearts/And the captain smiles, as we crash/Cause in the mind of Ronald Reagan/Wheels they turn and gears they grind/Buildings collapse in slow motion/And trains collide. Everything is fine” 35. Front 242 – “Tragedy >For You<”…With that skill that was hers alone/She drove her clutches into me/I was dumbfounded/She was hungry/She required me entirely…
Belgium. Reminds me of sophomore year in high school though I like this much better now than I did then. It’s great for staying awake during long, late-night drives 36. Danielle Dax – “Tomorrow Never Knows” 37. Jane’s Addiction – “I Would For You”
Another brand on the brain – junior high school, getting this album from my old friend Jeremy as a gift and not really appreciating it until much later, but isn’t that always the way? 38. LCD Soundsystem – “One Touch”…Complicated people never do what you’re told to… 39. Radial Spangle – “Patio Furniture”…it’s not gonna matter in a couple of days/it will all melt…
For my beloved, hardy, robust patio furniture 40. Aimee Mann – “Disappeared”…Somehow I wound up on your bad side/Til now, I guess I had a free ride… 41. Chaz Bundick Meets the Mattson 2 – “Star Stuff”…I could be wrong in saying/Everything falls into place… 42. Bunny Girls – “Why That Person?”
Korea 43. Hot Chocolate – “Heaven is in the Back Seat of My Cadillac”
I think this song is ridiculous. Right after I stumbled on it, I was at one of the Norway-Sweden border malls and saw this weird dude drive into the parking lot in a Cadillac (not a common car in Sweden) and then kept running into him inside the mall where he made a point of smiling creepily at me… ugh 44. St. Vincent – “Fear the Future”…In our bed, in our room/I come for you, come for me too… 45. Dolly Parton – “I Couldn’t Wait Forever” 46. Happyness – “Surfer Girl” 47. Kevin Morby – “Beautiful Strangers” 48. Martha Wainwright – “Ayoye” 49. On Dead Waves – “California”…The sun sets in California… 50. Monika – “Take Me With You” 51. Lea Porcelain – “Endlessly” 52. Onuma Singsiri – “Mae Kha Som Tam”
Thailand 53. Saint Etienne – “Out of My Mind”…Is this the end? I need to know/If it’s the start of something, where does it go?…
Love for Ben, Naomi 54. Jo Stafford – “The Gentleman is a Dope” …He’s somebody else’s problem/she’s welcome to the guy…
I do indeed enjoy cooking/baking while singing this at the top of my lungs 55. Jeremy Jay – “Airwalker”…Where can we go where the lights are low?… 56. Cabaret Voltaire – “Spies in the Wires”…ingenuity my secret rival… 57. Beck – “Up All Night”
Another good one for driving in the middle of the night 58. Heron Oblivion – “Beneath Fields”…Dreams from the days of suffering… 59. The Apostles – “Don’t Huzzle for Love”
Nigeria 60. Frank Zappa, The Mothers of Invention – “Trouble Every Day”
Timeless, thus timely, spot-on shit 61. Vincent Delerm – “Super Bowl”
Because who doesn’t pretend to like Joe Montana with ulterior motives? 62. Delicate Steve – “Don’t Get Stuck (Proud Elephants)”
For the dainty SD 63. Jessica Lea Mayfield, Dan Auerbach – “(David Bowie I Love You) Since I Was Six” 64. Laibach – “Sympathy for the Devil (Time for a Change)”
Another take on a classic… from Slovenia 65. Death in Vegas – “Dirt” 66. Dent May – “Face Down in the Gutter of Your Love” 67. Oumou Sangaré – “Koukoun”
Mali 68. Fiji Mermaid – “Lipsticked Lips of Yore” …transfixed by the lipsticked lips of yore…
For J. 69. Arik Einstein – “Beit Ha’arava”
Israel: the mystery man uncovered 70. Y La Bamba – “Orca”
Portland, Oregon 71. Jacky – “Dog and Pony Show”
For Martina; hoping she is not in a new dog-and-pony show 72. Eleftheria Arvanitaki – “Ta Schoinia”
Greece 73. Keren Ann – “My Name is Trouble”…My game is endless I tend to obsess/No game is up to my need to possess…
Worldly: Paris/New York/Tel Aviv 74. Echo & the Bunnymen – “Seven Seas”
Always loving the way “tor-TOYZ” gets pronounced; pretty sure this song will remind me of Halt & Catch Fire and Gordon Clark for the rest of my life 75. Death and Vanilla – “Moogskogen”
It will not surprise you that this is Swedish/from Malmö 76. Tropic of Cancer – “Distorted Horizon” 77. Maysa – “Vai Via Malinconia”
Brasil 78. Eivør – “Silvitni”…og eg gloymi mína óró/minnist aftur mína eydnu…
It won’t be often you’ll get something Faroese 79. Goat – “Talk to God”
A strange one from Sweden 80. Insecure Man – “Subaru Nights” 81. Mehrpouya – “Soul Raga”
Persian pop time 82. Part Time – “Honey Lips” 83. Googoosh – “Talagh”
Quite the mix: Iran-Azerbaijan 84. Robyn Hitchcock – “I Want to Tell You About What I Want”…I want a non-invasive kind of telepathy…
“You think I’m un-generous? Really? In what way?/The more you give someone the more they want from you”. “We’re replacing ourselves with artificial thought/And that could be our legacy/Before the feline dynasty/Scampers over history”
“Eight billion zeroes is still zero/If you got no heart” 85. Marching Church – “King of Song”
Denmark. Somehow this song also seems ideal for driving 86. Kleenex/LiLiPUT – “Die Matrosen”
Switzerland all-girl band, late 70s/early 80s; sadly the guitarist died last year 87. Jim James – “Same Old Lie”
Seems to be a social protest song of sorts; good timing 88. Reigning Sound – “Never Coming Home”…Upon each broken part of my heart/is the wear and tear of many years…
The American South. This sounds like something from many decades ago, maybe not only because of the sound but because of the reference to a “long-distance call”, which used to be such a big deal 89. Eleftheria Arvanitaki – “Fysa Psychi Mou”
One of those random discoveries in college 90. Holy Shit, Ariel Pink – “Written All Over Your Face”…Truth, it never really came between us…
“Keep every little scrap of paper/You never know what you’re gonna need/Your memories are sad distractions/Get so bright you can’t even see” 91. Talking Heads – “Psycho Killer”…Don’t touch me I’m a real live wire… 92. Jack Cooper – “North of Anywhere”…Too scared to say the wrong thing… 93. Takako Minekawa – “Fantastic Cat”
The Japanese and their cat love. I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t like cats 94. Rotary Connection, Minnie Riperton – “I Am the Black Gold of the Sun” 95. Natalia Lafourcade, Los Macorinos – “Mexicana Hermosa”
For Martina 96. Robyn Hitchcock – “Light Blue Afternoon”…and there’s no derailing destiny/she’s a single-minded girl…
“If you were not so aggressive/I’d feel pity in my heart/but your rage is so possessive/I just don’t know where to start” 97. Martina Topley-Bird – “Valentine”…they release you then you turn to see/Make it feel all right/The only thing is that I didn’t…
Somehow always makes me think of dear Jane. “I feel around and still you’re here” 98. St. Vincent – “Slow Disco”
Perfection: “Am I thinking what everybody’s thinkin’?/I’m so glad I came, but I can’t wait to leave” 99. Jean-Louis Murat, Morgane Imbeaud – “Héautontimorouménos”*
“Pour abreuver mon Saharah/Jaillir les eaux de la souffrance/Mon désir gonflé d’espérance/Sur tes pleurs salés nagera” 100. Broadcast – “Echo’s Answer…the message sent was of discontent/from incline to incline…
